Monday, 21 November 2011

My name is Nouf (21)

Nouf almost shrieked with delight when her husband announced that they'd better go home rest before their flight. Of course his mother protested and made unecessary comments but he didn't relent and she almost ran to his car with relief. He must had known that something was amiss because as soon as he started the engine and drove away his hand reached her thigh, settling on her knee. He gave her knee a gentle squeeze. " what's wrong? you were quiet most of the time? tisti7een min ahaly?" He said, kindness filling his deep voice.

I very much would love to practice my boxing skills on your mother's botoxed face. " mafeeni ella el3afya, bes shwai daykhaa"

His hand was still on her knee. " Namay al7een as much as you can, I'll wake you gabil la enro7 il ma6ar"

" Can I ask for something?"

" Name it and it's yours" He said.

She grinned. New husbands were simply perfect. This one was at least, Nouf thought lovingly, he rarely denied her requets, his complete attention was for her and he gave her everything she wanted, almost everything;  since she really fantasized about having her honeymoon on a tropical island, like most conventional couples, she wanted to wear bikini's, lie under the warm sun, get a tan and show it off. Unfortunately Sagir had other plans; he chose the least desirable place on earth for a honeymoon. A deserted, anonymous ski resort in Canada, she hated the cold, winter simply wasn't the season for her. She loathed layering jumpers and jackets which only made her look fat and unappealing, the entire gloomy nature of the season depressed her.  Yet...yet she couldn't say all these things to him. She have always been tongue tied and terribly shy with the men in her life. Never expressing how she trully felt or what she really wanted, even with her friends she hated to dissapoint anyone and it was a sorry trait.Most people called her a pushover and she couldn't do nothing about it, inspite of hating this side of her and desperately tried to change it, she failed. Unlike Sheikha. Nouf had always dreamt of being like her best friend, spirited, strong and courageous. Nouf's heart swelled with longing at the thought of her best friend, unfortunately she won't be able to see her before her departure. She decided to send her a long message instead.

He bought her her desired coffee and then they headed home. Nouf was unusually drowsy and very sore, every inch of her hurt and she wanted bed instead of packing her luggage. She changed into a tiny slik nightgown, bared her face of make-up and put her hair into a messy bun.

"My entire body hurt, I'm so uncomfortable" She complained as she climbed into the bed.

He sat on the edge of the matress and took her hand. " Did I hurt you..last night?" He almost whispered.

Her face turned pink abruptly. " Is-is this really necessary?"

" Yes, I wanna know if I did..I'm sorry" He said in a husky voice.

" Yes" She said, blushing furiously.

" It's natural to feel sore the begining, I promise it will feel less painful the next time we.." His words trailed as his eyed caught the dark blue bruise that covered her left arm. He ran his warm fingers over it, examining the mark. " hmm, you bruise easily" He told her and planted a kiss on the bruise.

A shiver of delight went down her spine. " Why do you think so?" She said, her voice a tiny whisper.

" Let's say I'm experienced" He smiled wickedly.

" That's not a very romantic thing to say!!" She punched him playfully on the arm.

" I'm not a romantic man" He grinned.

She rolled her eyes and showed her annoyance with a breif scowl. He wanted to kiss that scowl off of her pretty face. He wanted to take the annoying nightgown off of her, strip her of every piece of clothes and...

His phone rang loudly, interrupting the moment. He cursed under his breath and moved off of the bed.

while he talked on the phone, she lied in bed with her eyes closed, her skin still burning from his touch, she contemplated the events of the day, her amazing husband; dear lord, she loved him too much! she wondered if he'd stay this way after a year or two of marriage or if he ever wanted kids, she wished he'd stay this way forever.And then his annoying mother popped into her mind ruining the fantasy along with other unecessary thoughts of the ugly past, but then her lids grew heavier and weariness finally won over and she lost touch with the world.

Sleep was dark, sweet and dreamless . She awakened to the sound of a foreign alarm o'clock, blinking hard she tried to move and twist in bed but a muscular bare arm that was draped over her waist stilled her. She smiled, finally registering that her husband was sleeping next to her, his breath hot against her hair. She turned around to face him, settling herself closer to his side. He was sleeping on his stomach, his other free arm curved around the pillow beneath his head, his dark, eyelashes ridiculously long for a man casting shadows over his cheeks. Her hand involuntarily reached for his face, tracing his cheeks, his full lips and his jaw. He didn't move and his breathing didn't change but he shifted closer to her. She continued her joyous exploring, reaching for his arm, she traced the broad lines of his shoulder, sliding her hand to his arm with a gentle caress, he was so warm and smooth, that made her smile for his constant warmth puzzled her. Did the man ever get cold?

Then she lowered her small hand to his chest, drawing circles and silly hearts on his skin, unaware that he was fully awake by now. She jumped slightly when he captured her playful small hand with his big one. "Enough" He said in a husky, sleep filled voice. " You're torturing me"

His reaction to her touch made her heart swell with pride, she was so thrilled to discover that this gorgeous, desirable man could be so undone by her touch. The thrill of having the upper hand was too...too good to be true. But her joy was short-lived as  he bent over her and took her ear in his mouth, he bit at it gently and tickled the lobe, his hand moving down to her thighs, catching her short nightgown and drawing it upward. Her breathing grew shorter and harsher, and she had to grit her teeth to keep from showing him how she enjoyed his touches.

" Sagir, we have a plane to catch..oh!" She clasped her hand over her moved when he moved lower, biting her flat stomach. He laughed and kissed  the red spot softly.

The heat of his skin transferred to the coldness of her's and her resistance gradually weakened. She couldn't push him away. Damn it all she wanted to stay this way with him forever.

"S-surely the plane can wait.." Her voice shook.

" Definately" He laughed softly and siezed her mouth in a hot, demanding kiss.


The flight was excruciatingly long and hellish. Nouf wanted to weep with exhaustion. Although the first class seats were supposedly comfortable, her back ached and she simply couldn't fall asleep. Sagir tried his best to distract her, inspite of the fact that she didn't complain once.Her face must have showed it all; the weariness and the irritation. He talked, made her laugh and ate with her but then weariness took over him and he drifted to sleep.

And then came the long torturous trip to the snowy mountains. The driver drove carefully along the threatening wintry roads. She was looking out the window through the whole entire long ride, trying to catch something interesting but all she saw was darkness. It was unbearably gloomy and cold. She shook violently underneath her long wool coat. Her small hands frozen in her lap, she was in the verge of tears and she couldn't look at Sagir, afraid she'd lose it and slap him hard on the face for making her going through this ordeal. She felt nauseated and she could find no comfortable position. Sagir suddenly pulled her against him, wrapping her arms around her. "Lean against me" He whispered into her ear.

She didn't utter a word and did as she was told, leaning against him. He was incredibly warm, she thought grudginly, tucking her trembling  hand on the inside of his jacket. "I'll eventually die min il bard" She hissed.

"You won't" He held her tighter. " And quit the frown, we're almost there"

The rest of the journey became a blur, as she dozed off without realizing it. When they finally reached their destination, Sagir gently nudged her awake, she didn't open her eyes, only mumbled something and settled closely against his chest.  He helped her outside the truck, carrying  her all the way to the small cottage. The wind was harsh and agonizignly cold around them. He lowered  her gently on the big bed and went to get the baggage inside the cottage with the help of the truck driver. When the whole thing was done, he locked the door of the small, luxurious cottage and threw his weary body on the bed beside her. It was deliciously warm inside, he wanted to sleep with his travelling clothes on. The whole effort of washing up and changing into Pajamas was too exhausting, yet he forced himself to leave the bed and get a hot shower. He lingered in the shower, thinking about his sleeping wife. He brushed his teeth and shaved, finally getting warm. When he approached the bed, she was still unconscious, snoring loudly with her heavy clothes and shoes still on. He took off her shoes, her coat and stripped her off her sweatpants and shirt. " Don't you want to take a hot shower?" He shook her gently.

She looked at him as if he was an idiot and shook her head. "mmm 3afia abii anaam...later" She didn't make any sense, he laughed and dressed her in a nightgown she packed in her small handbag. He brushed her hair and that lulled her deeper into sleep, finally he put the brush aside, he wrapped his arms around her waist and slept, inhaling the sweet scent of her hair.

to be continued...

Monday, 14 November 2011

my name is Nouf (20)

The desperation in his husky voice made her turn around and stand right in front of him. She tried to see his face through the darkness yet failed. He extended his hand to her and pulled her on his lap. She searched his eyes for reassurance. When she finally found her voice she spoke, her voice was strained. " Sagir, I'm so fucking scared"

" I know baby, me too" He whispered while his hand moved to her hair, he tugged at it gently.

"really? I'm very impressed" She touched his bare arm.

He chuckled. "it's hard to believe I know.., your hair is the most beautiful thing, so shiny and soft" He pressed a rich lock of golden brown hair against his lips.

She blushed. "nonesense.."

" shut up and accept the compliment and let's go to bed."

And before she could protest he scooped her up and carried her to the bedroom. He dumped her on the large bed and went to the other side of the bed. Damn it he was sick of waiting and he wanted her as soon as possible.

The bed all but swallowed her up.She lied down on the bed straight on her back, crossed her arms across her chest, closed her eyes and said " I'm ready"

He had to bite his tongue to keep from laughing, she looked like a dead person, only her breaths were shallow and panicky.He had to do something to make her relax.

Her eyes still shut, she felt the covers being pulled back then the bed sagged from his weight, he streched and got closer to her.

"Nouf.." He whispered and tickled her cheek, she opened her eyes and slapped his fingers. " Don't tickle me I can't bear it!"

He gave her the most devillish of smiles. " I didn't know you were ticklish, that's.....very, very important to know"

She rolled her eyes. " I'm serious"

" Oh, me too" He kissed her brow and pulled her to him.

" What the hell am I going to do with you?" He whispered into her hair while holding her to him.

She sighed and wrapped her arms around his waist.

His fingers slowly moved to the straps of her night gown. He slid the thin strap off her shoulder and she held to him tighter, a single hot tear escaping her tightly shut eyes. "Shhh, I'm going to be very gentle, I promise" He whispered into her ear and planted a soft kiss on her bare shoulder.

She shuddered and her skin was warm; it was a good sign. He rolled her onto her back and kissed her, with the sweetest mix of tenderness and strong need. His fingers awkward and trembling when he touched her hair, smoothing it away from her face. the going tender and slow task was proving to be ten times more difficult than he'd imagined. Her arms reached for him to wrap around his body, she touched his shoulders, her arms, his neck and his face and then she settled for his thick hair. She looked achingly small and fragile beneath him and he didn't know what do to so he pulled back slightly, fearing that he could hurt her. The only sound was that of their harsh breathing, he whispered. " Nouf, if you want me to stop..say it now..because in a few minutes I won't trust myself to stop"

She touched his cheek and when she finally managed to speak her voice came weak "Don't...stop" She rasped.

And he didn't.

When Nouf woke up the next day, sun was streaming through the half closed shutters, she opened her eyes slowly expecting to see Sagir lying next to her on the soft bed. He wasn't. She tried to move to a sitting position but her entire body hurt, She felt her cheeks burning when she remembered last night. She sighed and burried her head back against the pillows.

As if on cue, Her husband appeared, entering the bedroom with a cup of coffee in his hand. "saba7 elkhair" He grinned, revealing the set of his pearly white teeth, his darkly tanned skin making them appear even whiter. She blushed, He was shirtless with only pajama bottoms, he wasn't even wearing slippers.

"ahlan!" She grinned back at him, her cheeks furiously rosey. " esa3a cham?"

He couldn't believe she was all shy and blushing after all the things they've shared the night before, he found it amusing and extremly, heartbreakingly adorable. He ached to touch her. " it's 12"

"ollah! I must have over slept, when did you wake up?" She said, her voice still husky with sleep.

" About an hour ago, I've missed you" He smiled devilishly, his eyes glittering.

 "Me too" Her cheeks turned beet red, she had to laugh it was the most ridiculous conversation she'd ever had, god help her she was so ridiculously in love.

" What are you having?"

"Black coffee, tabeen?"

"Yes please" She nodded.

He moved to her side of the bed, lifted her up and sat down and placed her on his lap. She took the cup of coffee and took a sip. "Mmmm thank you"

"Bel3afia" He planted a kiss on the top of her head. "ee tara elyoum ghadana ebait oboy, lazim ensalim 3layhom gabil la ensafir"

"What??? laysh maga3dtni abchaaar??" She almost yelled.

" ob oob, 3adii kelshay yamdii, elghada e6ee7 esa3a 2"

" ambaih, I better go take a shower"

"can I join you?" He smiled wickedly.

She rolled her eyes. "No!"

He spanked her behind. "klba"

"I'll make it up to you!" She grabbed a towel and hurried up to the bathroom.

Two hours later she was all dressed up and ready to leave the house. She took a final glance to admire her reflection before going downstairs to Sagir who was such a darling with this whole waitingwait ordeal, he didn't complain once, he kept cheking his emails and emailing work and she thanked god for that. She put on so much effort on her looks just to impress the mother in law and the sister in law precisely, she took a deep breath and studied her reflection to look for mistakes.

Her hair perfectly blow dried, cascading over her slim shoulders, complementing her long sleeved  orange silk dress which ended just above her knees. She put the sexiest of her killer heels, grabbed her classic chanel purse and left the bedroom.

His face lit up at the sight of her. "kil malich oo etsereen a7la o a7la" He said.

His compliment made her glow all the way to his parents' house, making her forget all about his family's irrational dislike for her.


" allah ehadakom ta2akhartaw! ubook mat min elyou3!" His step mother said as soon as they appeared on the door. The woman was impossible, it was fifteen minutes after two only, Nouf thought grudginly.

Sagir chuckled and planted a kiss on the crown of her head. "eshda3wa yumma, kaho el walid mafee ella el3afya"

 Nouf smiled nervously while holding the cake they grabbed from the nearest bakery. Her knees almost buckled and she looked at Sagir.

" 7i6eha 3l 6awla 7abeebti al7een elkhadam eyoon ewadoonha el ma6bakh" He said.

Nouf placed the cake on the dining table and went to greet her mother in law.

" Shloonich khaltii? asfeen 3l ta2kheer bes 3la ma maraina el bakery o-"

" 3ad Sagir moo min 3awaida yet2akhar.." She said coldly, interrupting Nouf.

He laughed. "Akthar wa7id yet2akhar ana!"

Nouf didn't, she forced a smile and stood up to greet the rest of the family.

His sister was nice enough, of course she gave Nouf the famous once over, but at least she didn't  make any mean comments. His father and brother on the other hand were utterly sweet, she couldn't help but fall in love with the three men of the family.

" bnaytii et'habil, walla Sagir yi6la3 minna" His father joked, smiling at her. She blushed and chocked back the lump forming at the back of her throat, she knew she was acting unreasonable, but unexpected kindness usually made her feel that way.

" Mashkoor 3ammi" She said politely. They were both sitting at the dining table waiting for the rest of the family to join them.

His step mother decided to ruin the moment with her acid tongue. " Nouf 7abeebtii goomay 3n hl kirsii, hatha mokan khalid"

Nouf's cheeks burned and she thought she was going to cry. " asfa, bes 3ammii gali ag3ad yamma" She forced a weak laugh and stood up.

" la 7asha walla Nouf latgomeen!! gi3day yuba ana ag3ad yam Sagir wela ay mokan! el walda allah e7afith'ha etagashmar wiyach, gi3day estree7ay" His brother said quickly, giving his mother an angry disbelieving look.

Nouf sat down, blinking back the tears of anger and humiliation, she wanted to punch that old wrinkly, or not really so wrinkly bitch! and to make matters worse Sagir went to fitch his nieces which meant he missed the whole horrifying incident, she will never be able to tell him how much she despised his step mother and even if she did so tell him of how she mistreated her , he'll never believe it, he was simply too blind to see her flaws.

Oh god, This was going to be a very very long lunch.

to be continued..

Saturday, 13 August 2011

My name is Nouf (19)

I'm so soo soo sorry for the extremly long wait ;$ I know I'm like the worst blogger!! you probably lost interest in this blog as well, but oh well, let's continue...

forgive me :*


She stopped for a mere second. please give me a moment to catch my breath, oh please help me god. She took several shallow breaths, her tightly lace corceted dress almost suffocating her. Behind her she saw her days of youth, carless, carefree and familiar youth. Before her was the unknown, her mysterious future, Sagir. Sagir! With wobbly legs that felt like jelly  she took two steps further and further until she reached her amazingly decorated"kosha". As soon as she sat on the beautiful luxurious seat, she was surrounded by family and friends, greeting and congratulating her and it didn't feel so lonely anymore. She was so relieved she had tears in her eyes.

She observed the dancing peacocks, swirling and moving gracefully on the glittery dance floor. These girls were more like a fresh basket of fruits, not peacocks, she decided. Several heads of shiny brown, black and one or two dark blonde shone under the enormous modern chandeliers, damn they were gorgeous. She thought with envious admiration .In the old days the bride used to be the center of attention and admiration, today Nouf didn't stand out at all, yes she was beautiful and elegant but she still wasn't the prettiest. That fact was amusing as well as depressing to her, the competition was fierce in the dance floor, these girls were competing in the classiest way possible, She swept her gaze over the sea of nameless faces, the familiar and the strange, the old and the young, and then... she saw her. Garbed in a simple strapless gown of offwhite silk, that clung to her voluptous curves perfectly, contrasting her dark bronzed skin, her shiny black curles tumbled over her bare wide shoulders, framing a face of rare prettiness. No she wasn't as pretty as Nouf, not even slim as her. She posessed real curves opposed to Nouf's stick thin figure, her black head the opposite to Nouf's golden brown satiny hair, yet...yet she had an aura of sophistication, grace and confidence that Nouf lacked and her heart darkened with envy. This very woman, was her husband's former lover, this woman who attended Nouf's wedding and danced gracefully and happily when in a lifetime ago she would have been in Nouf's place. She wondered if he whispered the same words of love he spoke to Nouf to this woman, if he kissed her the same hot, demanding way, if he...,she kept wondering and wondering in her wedding day when there wasn't supposed to be a place for doubts and jealousy and then a new group of friends came to congratulate the bride and the other woman was soon forgotten.

After several hours of dancing, showing off and socializing, it was time for the groom make appearance and Nouf was nervous as hell, she was about to start hyperventilating when Sheikha came to her side to rescue her.

"wain Noura, mashift'ha..l-laish mayet etsalim 3lai, oh Sheikha shaswii, Sheikha abi maai..." She was losing  control, her hands shook while she spoke and she was out of breath. Sheikha squeezed her hand and leaned down to whisper in her ear. " shhh, take a deep breath awal shai...yes, good girl...al7een ayeeblich mai, get a grip"

"wain Noura?" She sounded calmer now.

" madri, you know how she's like when-"

" No I don't! it's my wedding day and she's supposed to be enjoying herself 3al aqal tistanis 3ashani!, shal misakha!" Nouf snapped. They both knew that their best friends had a jealous nature, and ever since Nouf got engaged, Noura kept her distance, they both knew that it wasn't going to be the same for them after this day, specially that Noura wasn't there for Nouf when she most needed her.

" shhh fee camerat!! smile, be6agag elli e6igha, eb 3irs'ha ana a3alimha, ana lazim aroo7 now, that handsome groom of yours will grace us with his presence and I want to see his expression when he sees you" She grinned mischeviously.

Nouf couldn't help but smile back. " oh Sheikha, I'm so scared!"

"he's going to lose his mind looking at that pretty face of yours" She kissed her cheek and left her all alone and scared in her glorious kosha.

And then it was time. She had to face him. She saw his handsome face amongst many others, walking down the glittery aisle. With every step the groom and his men took, she felt weaker and her heart heavier, trying not to think of the enormity of what she was about to commit, she let her gaze drift over the crowds of people who were gazing at the groom. She closed her eyes for a second, took a deep breath and her lungs filled with the sweet scent of bukhoor and roses and then just then when she sniffed the achingly familiar scent of his cologne, and felt his presence as if it were a tangible force she opened her eyes. He planted a kiss on the crown of her head, took her cold hand in his and sat down next to her. Warmth spread through her and her whole body started to tingle. He was here! she thought wildly, her husband was here.

He looked like an arabian mythical knight in his crisp dishdasha, ghutra and bisht. His doe like black eyes, kindled a burning fire within her, within every young woman with sense in her head, his dark vivid coloring stirred pride and desire in her heart. Her husband was beautiful, as beautiful as the handsome arabian princes she used to read about when she younger.

He leaned down and whispered in her ear and she could recognize the humour in his serious words " I'm sorry you have to go through this, terribly sorry"

She chuckled. "I'm sorry too"

God help her, the next chapter of her life just begun.


Thirty minutes have passed. Thirty long minutes have passed with her husband waiting outside in the car expecting her to come down any minute. She gently pulled down her long veil , tossed it in one of her bags and smoothed her perfect chignon with her delicate fingers. She took her time looking around the beautiful luxurious suite. It was such a waste that they were not going to spend their wedding night here, just like most newly wedded couples, before travelling to their honeymoon destination. No, they were going to spend their first day in his house, their house. it was all Sagir's idea and the way he had spoke that thought to her with that smoldering doe like eyes of his looking directly at her soul, she simply couldn't say no. So here she was nervous and abandoned in her hotel room, making her groom even more nervous and abandoned than her. With a loud sigh she draped a small shawl across her tiny shoulders, took her purse and left her room with the assistance of her two cousins.

" thank you sweethearts, I can take it from here.." Nouf thanked her cousins as soon as they reached the back door.

" you sure?"

Nouf nodded, hugged them both and made her way out of the ballroom in the swirly perfection of white silk and satin that made her look more like an angel than a mere human being. Sagir opened the car's passenger door for her and helped her get inside and then they were on their way to home.

When he helped her out of the car, she put her hand in his and looked up at the majestic building that was their house. She took two steps forward and then she stopped dead, staring in disbelief at the massive amout of glitter! Home was beautiful!  A thousdand, No..a million little pink and white fairy lights decorated every inch of the big white house, glittering furiously just like a big, expensive pink diamond. It was breakthtaking, Nouf's chest tightened, she was speechless.

"I've been told you fancied pink jewellery" He whispered into her ears before she had the chance to say something.

" 3ajeeeb!" She whisprered. "how could you mana- oh,beautiful absolutely beaut- oh my love!" She turned around, wrapped her slender arms around him and drew him closer. " Thank you, thank you" She whispered huskily into his ear.

He led her inside the two story house and showed her around. The house looked thoroughly different from the last time she visited.It was newly furnished in luxurious cream, beige and gold. It looked perfect for, unlike the simplicity and cleannes of the old furniture which suited a single male more. She was thankful for the effort he put into transforming the house to suit his new life. Her husband was such a sweetheart. When it was time to show her the bedroom her heart started thundering and she felt dreadfully uneasy. Her nervousness beaded her forhead with prespiration and her stomach churned, she wanted to gag!

The bedroom was as big as the beautiful living room in the same floor. The king size bed dominated the room, with it's black leather frame, the crisp white coveres, the giant crochet black bed spread and the several gray and silver cushions. Inspite of the fact that she didn't choose it herself, she loved it tremendously! Her eyes then moved to the enormous plazma TV screen and the round cream leather sofa facing it. She hated having a TV in her own bedroom but at this very moment with her increasing nervousness she didn't really mind at all, she even liked the idea, just a little.

Nouf  excused herself to take a shower after the long tour around the house. Her house! She deliberately lingered in the shower, reminding herself over and over again that everything will be alright and that Sagir will be considerate and will know what to do, dear lord she was frightened.

When she was finished, she towel dried her hair and body, applied lavendar scented moisturizer and lightly blow-dried her hair. Her hands shook as she put on her little heart shaped diamond necklace, and then her fragile white night gown. The night gown was as light as a feather, as white as snow, not very revealing, yet not quite covered, she blushed furiously for the realization and decided to put on her equally white silk dressing gown.

The walk from the bathroom to their bedroom took forever, she nervously tightened the knot of her robe's belt, and made her way to the large bed. He was splendidly sitting on the bed, in only his pajama bottoms, flipping through TV channels, his hard, bronzed muscles in full display to her poor, terrified eyes. Sensing her presence he emmediatly looked up at her. His breath caught in his throat at the magnificent sight. God help him, she was exquisite. She saw the fires blazing in his eyes and the fear she tried hard to block, came rushing to the surface .She swallowed audibly and forced a nervous smile.

He smiled back. "ta3alaii..."

She joined him on the bed, feeling awkward and helplessly aware of her embarrasment. God, what was wrong with her! this isn't supposed to be this difficult, she knew this man, she trusted him, why on earth was she ready to run away if she had the chance?!

As if he sensed her uneasiness he asked her. " Am I making you nervous?"

She shook her head.

" you are making me nervous" He grinned.

"sij? laysh?" She knew he was teasing her.

" I'm not used to sleep next to a beautiful woman"

She giggled. "I'll make it easy for you...let's watch a movie! I brought a couple of DVD's with me and a popcorn bag!"

what the.. " M-matabeen etnameen?" He stammered stupidly. " Oh wait, we didn't have dinner yet" He totally forgot about that.

She shook her head almost violently, her hair spilling over her left shoulder, making her even more inticing and irresistible to him. Lord, she wanted to watch a movie and he...didn't want to.

" I don't want dinner, emsh el ma6bakh khansawii popcorn!" She said almost too excitedly. She grabbed his hand and shoved him off the bed. Too stunned to protest he followed his charming bride to the kitchen.

She threw the popcorn bag on the microwave and waited for it to be ready while he watched her every move intently. She was clearly nervous and frightened as hell but he didn't want to distress her more by telling her that she looked it. When the popcorn was ready, she poured it in two new bowls while he fetched drinks from the fridge.

"walla zain, it's stocked up." He said. " shino tishribeen?"

" madrii, water or hmmm fee redbull?"

He nodded. " bayeeblich athnain'hom"

He kissed her cheek and gave her a fierce hug before they went upstairs, he couldn't wait to touch her, he wanted to do it more than anything but he knew he'd ruin everything for her if he did it so soon.

Two hours later they were still sitting on the round leather table, facing the TV. His long legs streched out in front of him while she sat with her knees drawn up against her chest, her arms wrapped around them. She was thoroughly enjoying herself , snuggled up against him and eating slightly warm popcorn, he on the contrary was trying to pay attention to the movie but his mind and body were both distracted by the exciting presence of her in his bedroom. God, he wished he had more self discipline, he couldn't hold his annoyance any longer, he was annoyed with himself more than anything, afterall he was able to control himself all those past months from commiting the deed, why did this one extra night mattered so much? hell, it was because he fully well knew that in all cultures, a wedding night automatically meant one thing; lovemaking, and he obviously and unfortunately wouldn't get any tonight.

Another hour passed with her still watching TV, the movie ended yet she refused to leave the sofa. She told him she wanted to watch the other movie, he couldn't say no to her. He gave up.

" 7ayati ana baroo7 anam, etha khalastai join me" He yawned and stood up, trying desperately to hide his irritation.

" oh, taw ennaas.." Her face fell with dissapointment, she didn't want him to leave her, it was their wedding night for god's sake! and she was finally overcoming her fear and trully enjoying herself.

" enti allah ehadach 20 filim betshofeen, walla dayikh 7abeebi, ta3ali namai weyay.." He said, hope filling his gruff voice.

" mafeeni noom...khalas I'll go watch it bil salah, 3ashan ma az3ijik.."

" la you stay here, ana baroo7 anam barra. Good night" He kissed the top of her head, grabbed a pillow and blanket and with a quickened pace he left her to sleep alone, on their wedding night.

As soon as he left, the bedroom's air seemed to thicken around her. Her heart swelled with strange, heavy sadness, but it was better this way,she wasn't ready to sleep in the same bed with him, it was too soon for that and there would be many more nights and days to come, right? She could feel the tears burning at the back of her eyes yet she blinked them back, refusing to weep. She was going to act like a grown woman, watch the rest of the movie and go to sleep. alone

He strode into the living room, propped the pillow on the biggest sofa and lied down. He knew that if he went back to their bedroom and tried tender persuasion she would very likely be convinced to come to bed willingly with him,yet for some reason he couldn't do it. He sighed loudly and closed his eyes.

Several minutes have passed and neither sleep nor Nouf came to him. With a mixture of dissapointment and annoyance he turned his mind away from thoughts of her, let out a sigh of frustrated irritation and shut his eyes for the hundredth time.Exhaustion finally took mercy on him and nudged him to sleep.

Nouf stood before the enormous bed, torn apart between the confusing desire and yearning she felt for him and the fear she could not control. Pulling back the sheets, she got into bed and hid under the covers, trying desperately to stop thinking about him.

The task proved to be painfully difficult, if not impossible. She couldn't banish him from her thoughts and to make matters worse she was wide awake, it was the truth that she was aching to be near him. She drew back the sheets, put on her dressing gown and went to the living room.

To her utter dissapointment he was fast asleep. She stood and looked at him in the darkness for a long minute,and then something made her take several steps closer to him, until she was standing right before him. She marvelled at the beauty of her sleeping husband and wanted more than anything to touch his bronzed muscled arms. She leaned down and carefully drew the sheet up over his bare shoulders, unaware that he was a light sleeper she planted a kiss on his forehead and then straightened to leave and get back to the bedroom. She was about to turn her back to leave, when his voice came in a ragged whisper " Nouf, please don't leave..."

to be continued...

Wednesday, 18 May 2011

My name is Nouf (18)

Standing before the full-length mirror in her tense, cold bedroom, Nouf studied her reflection for the hundredth and last time before she went downstairs to meet her in-laws. Garbed in a pearl-incrusted cream satin dress that draped to her slim legs, making her look shorter and fatter around the waist. With her matching real pearl earrings, ivory sandals and red lips she looked like a younger version of her dear mother, she hated her dress, her make-up and her straighetend-to-perfection hair and with each passing minute more flaws appeared in the woman staring back at her, but she wanted to please her mother so she agreed on wearing what her mother had picked up for her.

She sighed in defeat and with trembling legs and a heavy heart she made her down the stairs and into the grand reception room where her family and his gathered.

The first one to catch Nouf's attention was Sagir's step mother. Sitting across from her own mother and her two much younger aunts, she looked the youngest and to Nouf's shock the prettiest. Clad in an elegant, above-the-knee silk dress, her glistening light brown hair tumbled over her shoulders and back, appearing even prettier against the rich coal black of her dress, the diamond studs at her earrings gleaming furiously with each slight move she made and Nouf couldn't help but admire her. Unlike her own conservative, old fashioned mother, Sagir's mother looked fresh, young and very modern. Next to her, sat his only sister who looked nothing like her mother but equally pretty in a pink, bodycon jersey dress, her black shoulder length hair, framed her small oval face with delicate,tanned features, her face glowed with health and she wasn't even wearing a lipstick, Nouf hated the way she looked even more. Standing before these two stunning women she felt very ordinary and common.

She greated all women politely and sat opposite her future mother-in-law. The woman gave her a cold once-over before muttering a question to bewildered Nouf. " shloonich Nouf, enshalla 6ayba?"

Nouf answered all her questions politely, until the woman began asking her personal, vicious questions starting with the simplest."chum 3omrich Nouf?"

" t-twent f-four" Nouf stuttered.

" ee mashalla, 7isabtich eb 3omir Sagir" She said coldly. " enti teshtaghlayn ma3aah, 3adil?"

Nouf nodded, trying to hide her hurt and bewilderment. " ee walla sayirli eb 7dood el five months"

Nouf knew two things at that moment, the first thing was; she looked nine years older than her real age, the second thing was; her mother-in-law hated her for no appearant reason.

" Nouf mashalla, esamoonha barbie el sharika" Her mother laughed cheerfully. " esmilla 3leha..." And her mother kept chattering away beautiful lies about Nouf, making her own daughter cringe with embarrasment and grit her teeth with fury.

The rest of the evening was disastrous, as Sagir's mother and sister kept asking her questions that doubled her uneasiness, and to her complete horror making her look no more than an ambitious, young gold digger. Her mother's behavior was even more shoking, she kept grovelling to them and muttering nice things that weren't entirely true about her only daughter. Nouf tried her best to hide her annoyance and hurt behind a mask of false merriment and her face ached with the effort it took to smile, she had been smiling the entire time and she was going to keep doing it until the two mean hearted women walked out of this room, and then she was going to explode.

" yumma fashalteeni!!" Nouf cried as soon as they were both alone. " laysh chethi etsaween 7aram 3leech!!"

" haw! eshsawayt feech??? elmara mistansa 3alaych o galat khan7adid maw3id elkhi6ba elrasmeya o elmilcha!! enti shfeech yanna o ga3da?? 3alamich etebachbechaayn?"

" shakli khaysis!! badlity etlawi3 elchabd!! ba7righa!! telgainhom al7een ga3deen yagrithoon feeni!! shefteehom eshgalaw 3anni!! e7asbooni 3aanis!!" She sobbed brokenly. She felt inferior and ashamed although she was fully aware that she didn't know anything wrong." fashalteeni fashalteeeni!! laysh chethi tgolelhom!! laysh etchathbeen?? ma7ad e6ale3ni bil dawam! wela a7ad darah 3anni!! o aslan omma hazi2atnii! 7asbalich laih wasalteeni elsima chethi betghayer rayha feenii??"

" e7tarmi nafsich o chub!" Her mother grabbed her elbow hard and Nouf cried harder. " enti mat3arfeen masla7tich...tawich yahil o safeeh, sim3eeni 3adil, ma7ad ghayyar rayhom feech ella ana, latgoleeli el rayyal yabeeni! elrayyal etha omma erfith'tich mayegdar eghayyir rayh'ha bes ehi shafatny san3a o shafat khalatich eshloon tharbeen, fa ghayirat rayha, al7een mabii asma3 minich wela kilma, thilfay 3n wayhe"

Nouf wiped her tears with the back of her hand. " baroo7 akalim obooy, tisbi7een 3la khair" 

She went to her bedroom, closed the bed softly and then she walked to her bed, sat down and burried her face in her hand and wept. An hour later, she couldn't push the awful events of the evening away from her feverish mind and damn it all, she already hated her fiance's family and even her own mother for her shameless behavior. Nouf was fully aware that they were ten times richer than her own family, she also knew that his step mother would have picked another more sophisticated bride for her half son if the choice was her's. She decided to take a hot shower to calm her nerves and by the time she was finished, she was down right exhausted and dead to the world in scant minutes.

Nouf awoke in the middle of the night to the sound of her phone. She reached for it between the damp pillows and pressed it to her ear. It was Sagir.

" Aloo, akheeran radaitai" His voice came, gruff and angry in the other end.

It took her a moment to register that she wasn't sleeping anymore and that he was really there talking to her. "hala" She muttered huskily, her exhausted voice, a mere whisper sounded so strange to her own ears.

" feech shai? you don't sound well" His voice suddenly softened.

"  kint nayma" She muttered with an enormous effort.

" ga3id adig 3laych min taqreeban 11 ella robi3, it's 3 now" He murmured.

" I'm sorry bes ethahir nimt oo ana madrii, I miss you" She said.

" me too darling, esh'saar 3la"

The mortifing memories of the day before came rushing back to her tired brain and she shut her eyes emmediatly as if she could stop the thoughts. " madrii" She said.

" hmmm, 7adich malich khilg" He chuckled. " bes baghait agoolich that we already set a date 7g gas elmahar, o I can't wait to get it over with, lo mansawii 3irs b3d a7san" He teased.

" khosh walla!!" Nouf sat bolt upright, the sleep was finally leaving her heavy lids. " lazim asawii 3irs or else, ommi ra7 titbarra mini..., mabii shai wayid kibeer, 7afla sgheera-"

" darling, you will have a big wedding" He stated calmly. " ommi elli mara7 etkhaleech"

She sighed heavily. " emsh enroo7 vegas o nis7ab 3lehom!"

" et'hagen?"


"hmm I had very interesting fantasies about you" He muttered huskily.

" stop it!! you're gross" She giggled.

"you love me"

" you're not suppose to say that, you're supposed to say something else!"

" et7ibeeni, etmoteen 3ley"

She laughed. " you're so romantic mashalla"


 Three months later and before their wedding day in one week Sagir came to visit his bride. He was waiting for her in the living room, fumbling with his phone when he looked up and saw her coming towards him. His bold eyes moved appreciativly over her face and body and a hint of proud possesiveness gleamed in his smoldering eyes and Nouf's stomach made a nervous back flip. He had never looked at her this way before, she realised, with this strange sexy possesiveness.

He reached for her as soon as she was within arm reach of him and pulled her into a fierce hug while burying his face in her soft hair. "Hmmm I can't wait to..." He murmured in her ears while his hand reached for shirt ,loosening the first button.

Her hand laid automatically on his chest, drawing him slightly back. " eshga3id etsawi!" She whispered fiercly. " ommi ehni ga3da et7oos lo etshofna 3adii nit6alag gabil la nitzawaj!"

" I don't care" He circled his arms tightly around her tiny waist and pulled her closer to him. A jolt of desire shot through her as her legs colided with his hard, muscular thighs and her heart began to pound in erratic confused beats when his lips touched the corner of her mouth. She thought he was going to give her, one of his hot, demanding kisses but he didn't, he stepped away slowly leaving her confused and shaken.

" I got you something" He said, and took out a small velvet box out of his pocket. " put it now, and don't ever take it off, ok?"

A small heart-shaped diamond necklace rested against the black velvet.It was beautiful and it made her heart swell with emotion.

" enzayn laysh etzif?" She supressed a giggle. She was fully aware that her future husband was a wild panther by nature and she meant to tame him.

His face reddened and he changed the subject. " fillay sha3rich, ma7iba chethi.." He commanded.

" haw! don't you like my pony tail? arya7 chethi.." She said.

He reached for her hair and slid the elastic band from it. " gitlich filleeh"

" you're unbelievable"

"you're still marrying me"

She rolled her eyes heavenwards.

" How do you feel?" He asked softly, contradicting his gruff, authorative nature.

" the same way I look"

" that good?" He teased.

The warmth in his gruff voice and the softness in his eyes warmed her heart at once and she felt her cheeks flushing. " I'm pleased to marry you"

" But ofcourse" He said with satisfied arrogance. " I've to go now, salmai o namai 3adil don't worry, everything's going to be...perfect. o adrii mara7 etkhaleeni ashofich again layh youm el3irs, ra7 olah 3alaych.., give me a kiss"

She leaned up on tiptoes, put her arms around his neck, and brushed her lips on his freshly shaven cheek and then she stepped back with a mischevious smile on her face, she left him dissapointed, wanting and very eager to see her again.

Later that night the unexpected happened and Nouf couldn't decide what to feel exactly. Just before getting ready to bed, her phone began ringing frantically and when she didn't recognize the number and refused to pick up, a message was delivered to her, a very unexpected message. She was overwhelmed with mixed emotions as she reread the message several times. It was from Faris, the man who mercilessly jilted her, without giving her a proper reason or even a proper goodbye. The man who hurt her dignity and pride and simply walked away without saying a word.

'' tara shifitch last week egbal shalaihna, yal khayna kil hl sexiness min warai? u were striking...I miss you too ;)" She reread the offending message for one last time and then Sagir came to her mind, her beautiful Sagir and the anger and digust suddenly subsided, replaced by  mixed feelings of gratitude, pride  and a strange sense of victory. She was going to marry a wonderful, honorable man in less than six days, she came along way and a simple, stupid message wasn't going to break her. Her heart burst with  pride it almost ached and she reached for her phone and absently dialled his number.

" Aloo, Sagir esma3 ana a7ibik amoot 3layk."


Clutching the bouquet of vibrant red roses to her chest, she made a step further.Unable to decide which shook more her small, french manicured hands or her legs. Sheikha came rushing to straighten the train of her best friend's wedding dress and stand beside her before she made her grand entrance into the ballroom. "bamoot min elkhar3a! yadroon enni badish?" She asked Sheikha worriedly, her heart racing harder by the second. 

" eeee 6abee3i enich etkhafen Noufa, now come inside o ba3dayn ensolif ok?" Sheikha assured her.

Nouf nodded.

" etyanineen, I'm so proud of you" Her friend squeesed her hand tightly and then Nouf made her way inside the glittery ballroom and Sheikha followed behind, holding the train of Nouf's dress.

A sudden bolt of anticipation shot through the five hundred wedding guests, as glamourous heads turned to take their first look of the beautiful bride. Clad in pearly white, strapless wedding gown that clung to her slender frame perfectly,her long dramatic veil fell delicately over her bare shoulders and arms, contrasting the smooth golden color of her skin and the glittering diamonds on her small earlobes and throats outshined and completed her entire look. She was an exotic beauty with her shiny, brown hair pulled up in an elegant chignon, framing soft, vulnerable features.

No one looking at her would have believed that the confident, cheerful bride was having a panic attack.

No she wasn't ready to do this, she wasnt ready at all!

to be continued....

Friday, 29 April 2011

My name is Nouf (17)

Nouf stared at her phone mindlessly, waiting for her phone's alarm o'clock to announce her waking up, in ten minutes she was to rise up from bed, dress up and start her ordinary work day, except that there was nothing ordinary about today or the three dreadful days prior to it. For three days and nights, she deprived her fragile body from food and sleep due to the guilt and remorse that were eating her chagrined heart. She had began her investigations right after that dreadful phone call and to her own shock and relief he was telling her the truth and she was too damn ashamed to text or call him, that and the fact that he didn't show up for two days in a row at work made her days as dark as the bleak, sunless sky of the dawn.

With a savage,unlady like curse she dragged her limp body out of bed, washed her pale face hastily and put on the first shirt that was before her eyes along with the same black pants she wore for the last three days, only this time she added a small belt to her narrow waist to prevent the trousers from falling. The incredible weight loss was undeniable but she failed to notice it. She wrapped the chocolate waves of hair,cascading over her back and slender shoulders into a pony tail, put on her enormous sunglasses and left the house in an unexplainable, irrational hurry.

She strolled into the empty office and as usual she was the first to arrive. She was also the last to leave. In her breif coffee break, she went to his office, ignoring the suspicious eyes and blazing tongues of her colleagues, she waited in anticipation and a faint hope outside the wooden doors of his office, but to her utter dissapointment, his secretary informed her that her boss was not coming to work today because of some important matters he had to deal with. The annoying secretary refused to give her further information so she reluctantly dragged herself back to her office.

In the fifth day, whatever shreds of sanity she had left deserted her slowly. The sleep deprivation mixed with the aching longing to see him made her at the edge of tears all the times, when she was alone she shed a couple of tears, tears that were so strange and hot and painful ;tears which were aimed to dampen the tormenting, unbearable self loathing she was experiencing.

When she hasn't heard of him or seen him in the office that day, fury shot through her entire being and she found herself finally having the courage to write a message to him. "I need to see you, now!". The message was so unlady like but she was too angry to have noticed that and when he didn't reply her an hour later she began writing endless angry messages, begining with hopeless,empty threats to pathetic, heart wrenching pleas.

After two hours of false concentration in her work and to her joyous disbelief he replied. He replied and he was here in this building, in his office, in this very corridor! Joy and relief seeped through her while she read the small, precious message. " cum my office, 5:14"

The hours passed by so slowly and with each passing minute her heart shook with anticipation and her brain screamed with uncontrollable hysterical thoughts and unspoken words. She was also very afraid; she didn't know what to say to him and she didn't expect what he had to say to her in return.

At twelve minutes past five, the office was entirely empty. With wobbling legs, she pushed her chair back and stood to straighten her appearance before meeting him. She rubbed her sweaty palms against the fabric of her skirt, took a deep breath and dragged her numb body to his office.

Her trembling, delicate fingers knocked slowly on the wooden doors, waiting for him to signal her to come in, she turned the door knob when his gruff voice came strong behind the door.

She was fully aware that she was a sight,with her frizzy hair, pulled away from her pale face in a tangled, unattractive pony tail, black circled her enormous eyes matching the gloomy colors of her shapeless, gray T-shirt and dull black, pencil skirt and finally those hideous, dirty black ballet flats. She wished that earth would open up and swallow her whole! And it wasn't her sight that made her wish that, it was the beauty of the creature that was before her. Clad in an italian suit, (minus the blazer) Sagir was sitting there on his desk all relaxed and gorgeous, his sleevs rolled up to his muscular deep tanned elbows, the first three buttons of his shirt opened, and his dark hair messy and gorgeous against his glowing skin. The contrast of his crisp white shirt and the deep tan of his skin made him look like a greek god. Power and authority emanated from him and she found herself shuddering with fear and helplessness. How the hell did he get browner over the weekend?! he said he'd sleep the weekend off for god's sake! She thought angrily, achingly supressing the fresh urge to weep.

He was here and he was handsome and healthy! While she spent the last five days in torment and regret he was...tanning somewhere.

" Have a seat" He offered, motioning at the chair seated before his desk.

" I..I'm fine where I am" She said shakingly, her head held high, contradicting the quavering of her voice and the furious trembling of her hands.

His eyes danced with laughter but he coughed and nodded. " so, you wanted to talk..."

Suddenly the ground began trembling furiously or was it her legs? oh my god, she needed to sit down, now! or else something very embarrasing is bound to happen. She took a step backward and he watched her with amused interest. "So?" He raised his brow.

" Can I sit...down?" and before he could answer her she found herself landing on the floor with gentle carefulness not to show him how shaken she was.

" on the floor?" He asked, supressing the urge to laugh.

" I-I like to s-sit on the floor" She lied.

" then can I join you?" He asked with mock seriousness. " I can't hear you properly from up here"
" sure, maktibik..kaifik" She mumbled lamely.

He sat down next to her on the cold, marble floor and crossed his arms around his chest waiting for her to say something appropriate. When he noticed the furious trembling of her small hands, a wave of sympathy and tenderness shot through him and he decided that he'd do the talking for her. He noticed her appearance, the exhaustion that masked her beautiful face and the incredible weight loss in her little body and remembered the first day he had met her in Bahrain. She was as upset as she was now, as scared and worried as she was now, as outrageously beautiful as she was now.

Damn it, he was begining to posses some pathetic strong feelings for the little girl sitting awkwardly next to him on the floor and it disgusted him, afterall men shouldn't fall in love, matters of the heart were women's concern not serious, grown up men, not Sagir.

"So..., we need to talk" He started awkwardly.

Please don't leave me. "yes"

quit looking so vulnerable, you're making this difficult for me." So last friday, there was er...some..misunderstanding, and well, enti wayid thayagteeni, esloobich, o 6areeqtich bil kalam 7asisatni enni-"

" I know, I-"

" khaleeni akamil kalami tali golai elli 3indich..." He said irritably.

Nouf ignored the aching lump in her throat and nodded.

damn it, she's going to weep. "elmohim Nouf I know where you came from, I understand raddat fi3lich bes ana fakkart bil mawthoo3 over the last a few days, oo  elli sawaiteh ghala6...elmafrooth kinti tes2ileeni before you attack me like that, kanat el7araka killish malha da3ii o sadgeeni wayid wayid thayagteeni, matwaqa3tich enti et7acheeni chethi, o mithil ma ana withaqt feech o e7taramtich, I expected the same from you bes you dissapointed me oo ana etwasalt enna ana weyach manisla7 7ag ba3ath"

painful, hot tears burned the back of her tired eyes and she bit down hard on her lower lip to keep herself from crying. " I understand" She whispered brokenly.

" kil hl 7anna and you don't have nothing more to say?" He teased.

She shook her head furiously. " I just wanted to apologize, I know what I did was wrong and I'm terribly sorry bes you can't possibly blame me, I..I don't know you very well"

" You don't?" He asked, hiding the amuesment in his voice. He never really considered dumping her, she was too important for him but he intended to teach her a lesson to avoid a similar situation in the future and because she did hurt him.

" I'm sorry, I think I should leave" The words came out of her mouth in chocked whisperes.

She was about to stand up when his hand came forcefully, grasping her elbow, pushing her down to the floor. " We don't suit as erm..a..boyfriend and...and girlfriend"

 A hot tear crept down her cheek. " you made that clear, can I leave now?"

" But I bet we'd be just perfect as a husband and wife"

" What?" She blinked, unable to believe the wonderful words he just spoke to her.

" marry me, Nouf" He said. " and stop crying"

She tried to say something but couldn't. She burst into tears.

" el7een laysh tabcheeen?? don't you want to marry me? kahals I'm sorry I didn't mean it"

Sobs wracked her slender frame and she covered her eyes with her both hands to save face." How the hell did you get your tan??" She mumbled between tears.

" your crying because I'm ...tanned?!" His eyes widened in disbelief.

" oh, shut up!" She sobbed.

He laughed. " mokhich thaarib, my sweet"

She reminded him of a puppy he used to have when he was a kid so he did what he used to do to it, he ruffled the top of her chocolate brown head. " don't cry, I don't like it when you do" His voice softened and he wasn't teasing her or jesting anymore.

She wiped her eyes and looked at him. " Do you really wish to marry me?"

He nodded. " I didn't mean to startle you, if you don't want to accept my offer I'll kindly-"

"  I hope you did mean to..." She whispered.

His eyes danced with delight and he automatically reached for her hand. " I take that as a yes?"

" yes!" She exclaimed.

" mabrook" He kissed her knuckles.

"alla ebarik feek"

" Can I ask you something?" She said.

" anything"

" that time in your house.." She trailed off, blushing furiously.

" I was scared" He confessed.

" scared? why?!" Her eyes widened in astonishment.

" You were too..., I couldn't stop..." He was rambling like an old woman but he made perfect sense to her and she understood fully, despite the fact that he didn't directly tell her the three words yet, she felt him. She felt his love.

With their hands interwined  they both sat there on the floor for an hour, each lost in their own thoughts. She, thinking about her glorious wedding gown, the wedding ceremony and spreading the good news all over kuwait as soon as she left his office. He, however thought about the single thing that most males preferred in a marriage; getting her in his bed as soon as she was officially his.

If only she could hear his thoughts.

If only he could read her mind.

With greenish blue bruises in her young face, a big grin and high spirits, Nouf left the facelift clinic with her two best friends in the world.

" enzayn are these blue bruises normal? ero7oon bisr3aa?" Nouf asked worriedly, after her first botox appointment.

" eeeh 3aadii, I do it all the time, yomain o wayhich yet3adal!" Noura assured her friend. " Don't worry!"

" in a week beseeroon your cheekbones like a super model's!" Sheikha muttered excitedly.

" a week!!" Nouf clapmed her hand over her mouth, unable to hide her panic. " in 3 days beyoon ahala eshofoonii!! oh my god,  OH MY GOD! I should'nt have listened to you two!"

" it won't show with make-up!! besides ana balaght yom gilt a week, the spots usually fade in 3 days..." Sheikha said reassuringly.

Nouf sighed loudly. " okay, I need a drink before the fake lashes appointment"

" starbucks?" Noura suggested. The girls nodded agreement in unison.

After getting brand new high cheekbones, extra-long, extra-thick eyelashes and extra-long, silky hair, Nouf was exhausted beyond belief and she needed the comfort of her bed and Sagir's soothing voice, so she decided she'd get home, retire to her bed and give him a call before moving to dream land, but her plans failed because as soon as she threw her weight in the satiny, inviting bed of her's she was dead and unconcerned to the world.

In three days, she'd meet his mother and the rest of his family, in three days they'd approve of her, in three days their engagement would be confirmed and official.

to be continued...

Sunday, 24 April 2011

my name is Nouf (16)

" yalait yakhthich wild Mona rifeejti, mashalla 3alayh adab o akhlag  weshzeena, o foug kil hatha 3inda khair mashalla, bes enti wayn kella emkamkima 3omrich matyeen tirtazayn ma3ai bil 3azayim" Nouf's mother told her while Nouf drove them to the chalet.

" mabi atzawaj wa7id ma3rfa" Her daughter replied.

" enshalla shlon bet3arfeena gabil el zawaj?? 7abeebti eyey ekha6bich el rayal taalii teyeen et3arifayn 3leh, sowalif 7ub o misakha hathi matamshi 3indi"

" yumma enti da2a adeema" Nouf said.

" chubbay"

" enshalla, basik el thalatheen o lal7een etcha3mooni! bachir jiddam e3yali etcha3mooni" Nouf complained.

" drama queen" Her mother said in a thick accent.

Nouf burst out laughing. " mino em3almich?? cuuute"

 " moo bes enti et3arfeen engalayzi" Her mother blushed. Nouf's mother was thirty six years older than her, she was so old fashioned and the age difference between the two made it hard for them to understand eachother and that led to a constant quarrel, yet they both secretly enjoyed the strange, warm friendship they shared. However Nouf liked her father best because he was everything a father and a man should be. He was a respectful and honorable, he was kind-hearted, generous and very understanding. he was all that and more and he loved his daughter with all his heart.Unlike her mother he spoiled his little princess yet treated her harshly when it came to teaching her the most imporant traits a person can posses, such as integrity and honesty, he wanted her to be the best in everything and she definately earned her good heart, honesty and pride from him.

" elyoom 7i6eelich hl k7aila wil 7omra o ta3alii ge3dai m3ana, khalatich o sadeeqat'hom beyoon, oo latsaweeli tasree7at leskhool maltich! na3mai sha3rich khal eshofoona"

" enshalla yumma" Nouf answered her mother automatically, she wasn't in the mood for another argument.

When Nouf drove by Faris's family's beach house in Bnaider she cursed under her breath and her mother heared her.

" 3alamich?" She eyed her daughter suspiciously.

" ma7ib waladhom emghazilchi" She said quietly, trying to hide her annoyance.

" haw, esh3alaych minna" Her mother said, curiousity filling her voice. " latitkalimayn 3n khalg allaa"

She snorted. " ok khayr enshalla" Nouf's mother always told her not to gossip about other people yet her mother did exactly that and Nouf found it for someone reason, funny.

Her family's chalet was already packed with her mother's sisters, friends and their daughters. Her aunts' beach houses where next to her family's and the entire family gathered here every weekend and this weekend was no exeption.Nouf went straight to her bedroom to steal a moment of solitude before she joined them again downstairs, today like every other friday would be long and tiring and she needed to be fully prepared for it. She streched down on the cold bed and reached for her BLACKBERRY, dialled Sagir's number and waited for him to wake up. The other night he had told her to wake him up at eleven, and it was already eleven thirty.

After dialling his number twice, he didn't pick up.With great dissapointment, she brushed her natural, thick waves that were spilling like melted chocolate around her shoulders and back, applied lipstick to please her mother and headed to the door. As soon as she turned the door knob to leave,her phone vibrated and a giggle tore from her throat. " mu sij!" She said before pressing the phone to her ear.

" Shsayir?" He said huskily, sleep filling his voice.

" ams geltli ga3deeni esa3a 11, al7een esa3a 11, sa7 elnom" She mumbled while she grinned involuntarily, she was so damn happy to hear his voice.

" oh, mashiba3t noum" He almost whispered, and she regretted it emmediatly.

" I'm terribly sorry, yalla ana akhaleek etnaam" She said apologetically.

" I love your voice" He suddenly said, still in that  husky,intimate voice, taking her by surprise. "it's raspy and very sweet"

She chuckled while blushing hard. " thank you!"

" entai bil shaleh?"

She was glad that he remembered. " ee!"

" enjoy it darling" He said surprising her again by the term of endearment he was using with her

for the first time. She swallowed hard. " t-thank you, you too enjoy your w-weekend"

" you enjoy it for me, shakli banaam le yom el a7ad"

" that's boring!"

" try working as a manager for some boring investment company" He teased.

She giggled. " I thought you liked your job!"

" I live for my job, ofcourse I like it"

" nice"

" hmm"

She ended their silly yet so sweet, phonecall and headed downstairs to join her family. The breakfast was messy, big and filled with laughter and endless conversations. Nouf ate, laughed and talked with her favorite cousins about her new job and the latest fashions while the elder ladies gossiped about the latest engagements, marriages and receptions.

Nouf was so engrossed in conversation with her eighteen year old cousin who kept asking her about her college days that she didn't  even hear what her other was telling her from across the dining table.

" Nouf shisma modeerich?!" Her cousin shouted again.

" halaa?" She yelled back.

" your manager, elli wathifich 3inda!, shisma??" Her cousin demanded empatiently

" oh, ee Sagir AL-fulani" she said, her heart skipping a beat by the mere mention of his name.

" tara sa7 ohwa!" Her other cousin said.

" la7tha shel salfaa?" Nouf asked, now curious than ever.

" tathkireen Zain al-fulani elli kanat ma3ai bil jam3a?"

Nouf shook her head.

" embalaa et3arfeenha, hatheech elmamloo7a el smayra, sha3rha curly? elli es7abat awragha o ra7at tadris barra?"

" aaah, ee 3araft'ha" Nouf said. " eshyab el6ari?"

" She's married to your boss!" Her cousin grinned mischievously.

" What?" Nouf stared at her blankly.

" hathy tizawijat Sagir, the owner of the company you work for"

Nouf Laughed nerveously. " No, this is a mistake, ohwa moo mitzawij"

" yes he is! yal thakeya, tathkireen marra dazaw broadcast khi6ba taqreeban last year? ehya tiseer cousin rifeejti o rifeejti dazatli eyaah o ana dazaytlikom!"

Nouf paled and her heart began thumbing hard." mit2akda?" She swallowed hard.
" walla el3atheem, awareech el message, mitsayiv bil history" Her cousin said proudly.

" egoloon ti6aligaw" Her other cousin provided.

"noo lal7een together, egoloon tishtighil ma3ah! ana esara7a madrii 3anha bes her cousin etsolif o chethi"

Nouf's face slowly drained of color and she was clutching at the wooden dining table forcefully for support, a married man?? she thought almost hysterically, she kissed a married man?? she was falling for a married man?? the whole idea was so ugly and revolting to her own ears that she almost threw up right there and then.

In his little modern kitchen, Sagir poured himself a cup of freshly ground coffee, while holding the coffee pot in his other muscular hand. He stood in the kitchen barefoot, dressed in only his pajama bottoms, his hair in wild dissaray, contemplating his future and his new found lovely girl.

A year ago he had finally decided to marry, and his beautiful second cousin whom he held powerful feelings for was the one and only candidate. Sagir trully believed that he had strong feelings for her, as she was intellegent, witty and simply different. She came back home after three years of studying abroad and the moment they lied eyes on one another there was an undeniable spark between the two. He never thought that he'd fall for his mother's cousin's daughter but it was there and he couldn't ignore it and to top it all, she welcomed his love with an open heart and agreed to marry him.

In their first engagement days, he discovered that she was in love with someone else and that Sagir was a mere tool to make the other man jealous and to his own horror and humiliation, Sagir was the other man, not the other way around. After that painful, ugly discovery he called the wedding off and banished the idea of remarrying.

After a whole year of being loyal to that decision his traitorous heart began softening toward another woman, another magnificent woman and suddenly his single marvellous life seemed so dull, so plain and in desperate need for a woman. Nouf was very pretty, he thought, but it wasn't that that drew him to her, she was incredibly sweet, smart and kind-hearted, most importantly she was everything his ex was not.

He wasn't sure if he loved her yet but he liked her enough to know that with time he would and that she represented everything he wanted in a wife. In the four months they had been together she showed him that she wasn't another mindless, airheaded beauty and he knew that she was in the perfect age to marry and even bear a child.

He'd see her tommorow and talk to her about it, he thought with a smile.

After fifteen minutes of trying to supress her furious rage and tears, Nouf burst into hysterical, uncontrollable laughter. She didn't believe how fate was being cruel to her! and she didn't know how to react to that so she found herself torn between laughing and crying, confronting and ignoring him, she decided to do the latter.

An hour later Nouf tossed the whole matter behind her head and decided to enjoy her day with the rest of her family, she did not want to spend another tear on that adulterous, filthy man. She put on her swimming suit, short shorts and headed downstairs again and to the pool were the girls were gathering.

While the girls talked, ate freshly cut melons and swam, Nouf didn't, couldn't fully enjoy herself. He took advantage of her and she couldn't simply ignore the whole matter! She decided she'd confront him next sunday, impersonally and while they were at work, meanwhile she'd enjoy her time without the constant interruption of his face in her mind.  A fresh surge of anger shot through her and she took another dip in the swimming pool to cool off.

At six pm. the girls finally left the pool and went to dry off and change. Nouf went to her bedroom and involutarily the first thing she did was to search for her BLACKBERRY. She picked it up from under her pillow where she forgot she even put it there and to her horror there were three missed calls from him.

With a sigh of frustration she put the phone down on the pillows and headed to the bathroom. When she finished scrubing herself red, blow dried her hair and put on fresh clothes she picked up her phone again and began writing a message to him. " I don't want anything to do with you anymore, kindly delete my number, and if you no longer  want me to work in your company, I'll gladly resign. BYE!"

In less than five minutes her phone rang as she had expected. Her heart sank and her hands began to tremble, she closed her eyes and desperately fought the urge to pick up the phone.

The phone stopped ringing after a few minutes and she let a loud sigh of relief. She rose from her bed and began to leave her depressing bedroom when her phone beeped announcing a message and she collapsed back down on the soft sheets with a moan of defeat.

" may I know why?" She read the simple four words and sudden outrage exploded in her brain. She picked up the phone and dialled his damned number hastily , her fingers shaking with indignation.

" Why did you lie to me?? why didn't you tell me what you really are??" She yelled. "of all the sick,vile, low people-"

" lie about what exactly?" He interrupted her calmly.

His cool tone made her even angrier and she thanked god he wasn't anywhere near her. "why didn't you tell me you were married?"

" what?"

" you heard me!" She snapped.

" I'm not married to anyone" He said icily.

She laughed without humour. " stop it!! khalas I know the truth you don't have to hide it anymore, bes I called to end this stupid, sick game! I don't want to play anymore, I'm breaking up with you!"

" you're crazy" He suddenly said. "I refuse to talk to you in this mood, oh and next time make sure your "information" is correct before you attack me like this and by the way there will be no next time.bye" He ended the phonecall without even giving her a chance to react.

Her chest rising and falling with fury, she looked at the phone in her damp hand and remembered his calm, insulting voice. She felt tears sting her eyes and the indignation she was feeling slowly subsided replaced by great pain and a strange sense of loss, because a part of her actually believed that he was telling the truth.

to be continued...

Wednesday, 20 April 2011

my name is nouf (15)

" so you're telling me that he had the chance to kiss you but he decided..not to?"Sheikha asked Nouf slowly trying to analyze everything her dear friend had just told her with so much anger and frustration.

" jeez, that's weird" Noura frowned.

Nouf nodded, ignoring the feeling of fresh annoyance that was sweeping over her. She spent the last two days overthinking about the humuliating situation and help her god she was starting to get angry and just didn't have it in her to tolerate some other jerk who had the face to act that he cared.

" damn it, this is so embarassing" Sheikha chuckled. " maybe he's gay!"

" you think?" Nouf said sarcastically. " you know, once I caught him flipping through vogue paris, not to mention that he always dresses so fashionably!..oh and those shoes!"

The girls laughed and Sheikha patted her friend's hand. " his loss, bes Nouf, you shouldn't have went to his house-"

" I know, I know!" Nouf interrupted her. " I think there's something terribly wrong with me-"

" chub" Sheikha interrupted her firmly. " there's nothing wrong with you, it's just that you have a habbit of falling in love with the wrong ones"

" and I thought this one was different" Nouf sighed. " the weird thing is, I don't feel sad. be6agag elli e6iga, I'm just angry"

Noura eyed her suspiciously. " that's great Nouf"

" oh, please" She snapped. " I thought you knew better than this"

Sheikha placed her cup of coffee hard on the wooden table making a loud sound and that brought the two girls' attention emmediatly to her, she cleared her throat and began to speak. " listen, I liked this Sagir enough to give him a chance, maybe he wanted to save it for a better time, place?"

" what kind of man would think such a thing while getting intimate with a girl,any girl?!" Noura asked.

" you little bitch" Nouf smiled at her friend.

" sorry" Noura mouthed sympathetically.

The girls were having an early breakfast at prime&toast and Nouf decided to join them before heading to work.It was a gloomy sataurday and obviously she didn't have to work on gloomy satuardays, not that she ever worked on any satuarday but she had to catch up on her unfinished work, especially after that pointless, stupid one day trip her boss forced her to go to! She thought angrily.After finishing two cups of coffee Nouf had to excuse herself and leave to work. It had been two days since she last heard of Sagir, and she resisted and fought the urge to call or text him, and boy that was the hardest thing she had to do. She wished that he'd called her and explained to her why he bailed on her, and she'd forgive him at once! she knew it, but he didn't and she hadn't been this angry her entire life.

Tucking a strand of soft brown hair behind her ear, she made her way into her office which was for some reason empty. She landed all her weight in the chair facing her desk and began working. if I put all my heart in my work it might take my mind off of other less important things, she thought with a loud sigh.

luckily for her there was a lot of work to do, since that business trip her work accumulated and today was her most suitable time to catch up. after several hours of hard working in front of the computer with only excusing herself for a couple of times to the toilet, she finally drew back her chair and looked up from the screen only to see a tall, broad shouldered figure towering over her desk, she jumped with surprise. " damn you!" she blurted out.

Sagir was standing there looking at her, she didn't know how he got in here as she didn't hear him coming. " I'm sorry...again" He said, amuesement filling his deep, gruff voice.

" I gather you're developing a hobby of getting scared of me" He added.

" I gather you're gathering a hobby of surprising me in my office" she mimicked him.

He bit back a chuckle.

" stop sneaking up on me!" She yelled.

" I'm the boss, I do as I wish" he said icily and that made her angrier.

" okay Mr boss, I think I've finished my work here, can I leave?"

" you're mad at me" He said in that cold tone of his and it wasn't a question. He was so arrogantly stating a fact.

" why would I be mad?" She demanded impatiently.

He took two steps closer to her desk and her heart leapt. He must have felt it because his smooth, inviting lips twitched into a smile.

A wave of unwanted heat shot through her entire body and she shook her head with confusion and then the unexpected happend.He knelt down before her chair and took her small, cold hand in his warm one.

" damn..." He cursed under his breath, and her eyes widened in disbelief. " shfeek?" Her voice shook with a mix of emotion and worry.

" I..I'm..." He frowned. " Nouf?"

She looked at him, still confused. " you look thinner" he said.

" thank you" She said.

" that wasn't a compliment" He said harshly. " laysh maywakloonich?"

She chuckled. " you like fat women?"

" I like women who look like women" He said.

She shot him a resentful look and snatched her hand away from his. She shoved her chair back and began to stand up, he stood up with her, blocking her view with his powerful frame. " I'm leaving" She said, her voice shook with fury.

" you're not going anywhere unless I say so" He said, a sense of authority in his gruff, deep voice.

" who the hell do you think you are?!" She snapped.

" why, your boss" He said, giving her a hard look.

" You arrogant, loathing-" and before she could continue enlisting all the insults she knew to provoke him he pulled her in a rough kiss. Her breath was sucked out of her lungs as he parted her lips forcefully, roughly with his hot, teasing mouth.

His finger dug painfully in her arms when she resisted at first, but as his kisses deepend she lost control over her achingly strong emotions and  kissed him with almost the same urgency and passion that she was recieving from him,and that was when his roughness turned to sweet, torturing caresses along her back and waist and she was absolutely sure that if he pulled away from her now, she'd...hurt. Her hands circled the nape of his neck and pulled him closer. She should be offended, she should be pushing him away, do anything but melt into his arms. She cursed herself for being to easy when it came to him, why didn't she have any problem with resisting all her exe's? even Faris, the one she thought she was madly in love with, wasn't a problem to her control. She lost her control now, in front of a man she barely knew, in front of a man she wanted oh so much.

He was arrogant, stubborn and...irresistible! She let out a groan of defeat and he finally pulled away, resting his chin on the top of her head. She was the first to speak. " you are a man of contradiction"

" you're still mad at me" He said again through her hair, pulling her closer to him.

" I'm not, I're weird" She said.

He laughed. " I've missed you"

" oh you missed me so much that you decided to ignore me?" She said sarcastically.

He didn't say anything for a minute but when he spoke again the cheerfulness in his voice was gone. " you won't understand" He said.

" No I won't" She snapped.

" Will it matter if I said I'm sorry?" He looked down at her, she was very upset, he noticed and it took him a huge effort that almost caused him physical pain  to stop himself from kissing her again.

His tormenting uncertainty vanished when he saw a hint of an approving smile on the corner of her lips. He let out a loud sigh of relief  and she chuckled.

" wow! I think I love to see you like this" She grinned.

" Like what?"

"never mind" She waved her hand dismissively at him. At that moment she was hundred percent positive that he cared for her and that she held some sort of power over him, she saw it in his eyes when he was so desperate to prove to her that he wanted her and that what happend before today didn't matter.

" okh" He suddenly spoke after a moment of silence. " esa3a 3addat 2, nesait enni emwa3id el ahal atghada ma3ahom, I'm sorry Nouf kan weddi I spend the entire-"

" No Sagir, min sijik! my parents are awaiting me for lunch too" She lied quickly. " you go to that family lunch, oo I'm sorry I distracted you" She blushed.

" you did" He said, amusement filling his deep voice. " but that won't stop me from walking you to your car"

The building was completely empty, she noticed as they walked to the elevator together. He kept gazing into her eyes when the elevator's door closed behind them and she couldn't help but giggle as it was so corny and the fact that she enjoyed it made her laugh even harder. She'd never experienced anything of this sort, she happened to realize that later, because when she was with Faris, their relationship was so distant, so cold and superficial, and to her embarrasment their relationship revolved around the fact that she was desperately trying to win his heart by showering him with gifts and doing all she could do to please him while he treated her like dirt, made her feel insecure and in constant fear of being deserted any second. She also came to realize that she never loved him as a person; It was his charming looks that she loved, his powerful name and the fact that he was one of the most eligible bachelors in kuwait.

Sagir's phone rang, and he picked it up emmediatly, moving his eyes away from her's to concentrate on the phonecall. " hala yumma" He muttered through the phone. " mani em6awil enshalla, enshallah, ok, ok ma3a elsalama"

" troubles?" She smiled at him.

" la bes el walda mat3rf takil ella o ana yamha" He said, returning her smile.

" ya7lelha, allaa ekhaleeha" She said, touched by the way he talked about his mother. 

" allah esalmich" He replied politely.  

He walked her to her car, kissed her hand tenderly and waited for her to start her car's engine and drive then he walked to his. Nouf could barely concentrate on the road, she played Frank sinatra's strangers in the night and sang along " something in your eyes was so inviting, something in you smile was so exciting" and blushed gorgeously when she remembered his passionate kisses.

When Sagir reached his family's house, his nieces' joyous laughter filled the magnifecent garden of the house and a delightful grin filled his  handsome face. They ran up to him as soon as they spotted him walking to them across the vibrant green grass, the two girls adored him for he showered them with gifts and love.

" hii uncle" Luluwa the three year old wrapped her arms around his legs when she saw him. He picked her up and planted a kiss on her soft cheek.

" halla wallah eb 7abeebti" He said.

Haya, the seven year old niece tried to grab his attention by tugging at his dishdasha and blowing the enormous gum that was in her mouth. She was so tiny comparing to his tall, broad shouldered frame that he had to kneel down to talk to her. He smiled knowingly and took hold of her hand. " hala wallah eb hayoona, taghadaitaw wella na6reeni?"

She blushed furiously and nodded. He laughed and walked to the house with both girls clinging to him.

Inside their big house, his half sister and her husband were sitting in the living room, across from them sat his younger half brother with his step mother next to him. " Esalam 3lekom" He muttered and headed straight to his step mother,  kissed the crown of her head and greeted the rest of his siblings and his sister's husband. " 3ayal wayn oboy?"

" ga3id eb maktiba egool 3inda shighil, mal o oho yan6irik, kelina yowa3a" His step mother complained. 

He smiled. " Asif yumma 7abebti, al7een agoom anadeeh" 

He stood up and made his way up the stairs to his father's office. Sagir was born and raised in this big, beautiful house and although he moved to live in a seperate house five years ago, this house was home to him, it meant much more to him because for one thing he could still remember his mother's sweet voice filling the house, her laughter when she played with him, her warmth when she told him stories of soldiers and heroes before kissing him goodnight and finally her cries of anguish when she was too sick to know he was there listening to her heart-wrenching cries and shuddering with fear. He was eight years old when his mother discovered that she had a deadly breast tumour . He didn't understand anything at the time yet he knew something was terribly wrong because one day after he came back home from school, his mother was sitting in the living room, her face red and tear-stricken. She blew her nose and dabbed at her teary eyes when she saw him coming to her and his handsome, young face fell with horror and surprise.

His father said cheerfully, trying to hide his fear. " omik babyyaa, tabchii mithil el yahal"

Little Sagir giggled at that " laysh?"

" 3ashan qazooha ebra o ehya takhaaf" His dad grinned, his eyes twinkling with unshed tears, But Sagir was too young to notice that.

 Sagir approached his mother and held her hand. " mama, latabcheen ohwa e3awir bes ebsir3a..e6eeb"

His mother wept harder and hugged him to her.

At bed time, his mother didn't come to kiss him goodnight or even made sure that he brushed his teeth and was in his pajamas for the first time in his short life. He drew his bed covers back, rolled out of his bed and made his way to his parents' room. He froze before their bedroom's door when he heard his mother's loud sobs and his father's hard voice. " el walad wayid mit3alig feech , lat3aqdeena min sighir, 3ashani latabcheen jidama marra thania, khaleech qaweya, ohwa mi7tajich wayid  hl fatra"

" shagoola? mabuga shai el diktor egool mintishir" She cried.

" ensafir barra" His father said.

Five months later she passed away.

A year and a half later his father married his cousin who loved Sagir like her own child and gave him a little brother and a sister.

to be continued...