She hesitated sitting on the wooden, damp bench for she was afraid of ruining her expensive jeans. A huge tear escaped her soft lid only to land on the already wet bench, she cried for her, for her loss, for this dark, merciless night.
Her legs began aching so she surrendered and sat down on that bench she dreaded. How very human of her. She looked up at the dark , star less night sky and more tears began falling, one after another. Desperation invaded her heart, her body, her precious soul and she didn’t find a way to rescue herself. So innapropriate for a girl to be out in this hour, yet she chose life. Staying in her bedroom meant death and she wasn’t ready for that.
A little wind coming from somewhere, blew across her body and ruffled her shoulder length straight hair and her body shivered in response. Her phone; her major source of unhappiness rang, breaking the painful silence of the night, her heart didn’t jump like it used to, she didn’t glance at the screen emmediatly like she used to do everytime it rang and she didn’t pick up like she used to.
"shhh" she muttered, soothing her wounded soul while keeping her wet eyes shut.
A single droplet of rainwater fell from the sky and landed on her left cheek. She opened her eyes and looked up at the sky again, to face the natural shower that was about to wash her clean.
" you're crying too?" she spoke directly to the sky. " I'm sorry"
Three hours ago she was the first to attend his event to support him, his crappy event. She was too sick to move from bed yet she showed up Wearing her hair down exactly the way he loved it, and the red lipstick he thought looked good on her perfectly covered her full lips. She smiled, clapped her hands excitedly until they turned a deep shade of red and she tried so hard to love his crappy work that lacked originality. She tried.
Not a word of appreciation or even a simple text message, he smiled breifly when he saw her but never stopped to chat with her even though she saw him talking and thanking many people she didn't know, mostly very pretty girls.
" it's 2 a.m Hessa…why arent you safely tucked in your bed?" The night said.
" I see his face while awake, while on a public park…" she chuckled between tears. "sleep makes everything worse…I am not ready to die and see his face in my grave"
" Go home" The night ordered.
She did as she was told. She got in her car and played her current favorite song " ما ظنتي" while driving. The way abdulmajeed sang " thaya3tnii 7isbi allah 3alaik" made her cry so much as she could relate to the song, she literally was lost.
A year has passed and it feels like an eternity ago but the pain is as fresh as ever.
She is still trapped.