white

I was really inspired by the beach and the ridiculous beauty of the islands so I wrote this, I don't know if there's more of this story but I think whenever I'm free I'll write...hope you enjoy it PEOPLEZZ;**

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"Kill yourself?-what's the point? It achieves absolutely nothing." Precisely: it achieves nothing and nothingness is what I want." I recited these famous words once again in my head. Words were written by the Austrian poet, who killed herself two months after writing them. Why would anyone crave "nothingness"?. Does the question even matter? The damage was done. She wasn’t happy with us. My mother wasn’t happy with us, that’s why she killed herself. Maybe she craved nothingness. Maybe nothingness was her aim.

I enjoyed lying between my own sheets, free and unbound but I couldn’t sleep, I tossed and turned in bed just like any other night. Hell, it had even become a routine to me. Dark circles were a dominant part of my soft, baby face. They were a part of my eccentric, dark personality.

There wasn’t a chance in hell that I was going to be able to sleep so I decided to get up and head to my favorite place in this island; the private beach.

I wrapped my crochet shawl over my nightdress, pulled my thick long hair into a ponytail and took my keys. I caught my reflection accidently in the mirror and gasped, I avoided mirrors as much as I could. I never liked what I saw.
I ran down the short stairs of my small shack-like house, and into the narrow street. The air was crisp and delicate as it surrounded the midnight streets. It slapped me gently, as soon as I was out. I inhaled it deeply and started walking to my favorite place. I lived two streets away from the beach, so getting there by foot was easy. As I walked past the small buildings near my house I could see the moonlight painting patterns upon the dark, asleep island.

I could smell the salty sea breeze as I approached. The rich scent filling my lungs as I inhaled. I sat on my usual spot preparing myself for my own ultimate bliss. I slid down the rubber band that was in my hair and let my hair fall down my back forcefully. This was my personal heaven, my own little happy place; there was no need to hide. I shut my eyes. The air blew my nightdress furiously; I let out a giggle while I remained still with my eyes closed. My hands automatically reached for the sand, grabbing it gently, playing with its softness.


The usual feeling of relief washed over me, the relaxation that came with the sense of isolation and serenity, the ease and the familiar comfort. But there was something different about that relief, it wasn’t the same one I felt every single day since I started coming to this little haven of mine. And I couldn’t fully relax. There was definitely something different tonight and I couldn’t blame it on the suddenly cold weather. Different wasn’t even the word. Something was wrong about my happy place.

I shifted uneasily from my position, and opened my eyes slowly. I took in the beige sands and the glittering dark sea water under the moon light, the ridiculously bright green palm trees and the long grass. But something else caught my eyes, a new thing in my happy place, a scary thing…a dark shadow behind a tall tree.

I caught my breath and jumped to my feet when I noticed the shadow approaching me. I wrapped my shawl tightly around my body and brushed my hair back with my fingers. I could see the shadow clearly by now, a man was standing right before me, a dangerous looking man.

"Perfect night for a murder, huh?" His thick, masculine voice spoke, making me jump in my place.

A bead of cold sweat trickled down my forehead; I shivered slightly although it wasn’t really cold.

"What's wrong pumpkin? I'm not really scary" he flashed his yellow, jagged teeth in a very wicked grin.

"Um…I think I'll head home" I muttered softly.

Suddenly he ran towards me and held my arm in an incredible strength "not so fast" he said.

"Get off me you…" I was about to finish my sentence when his big hand reached for my face and shut my mouth. I tried to scream but he wouldn’t let me go. I struggled to free myself from his strong, dirty grasp, but he was much stronger than I was.

His other hand reached for my thigh, I screamed at the top of my lungs but it was muffled with his hand covering my mouth. "Don’t scream you bitch, I'll finish it quickly" he said huskily while he tried desperately kissing me.

I started crying violently because at this point I knew that I was completely alone and completely…dead. His small, dark eyes bore into mine and I couldn’t take it, I lifted my head up and looked at the beautiful moon above me, trying with the little strength that was left in me to ignore watching my slow death. I closed my eyes.

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I didn’t feel a thing, not a single thing. No pain, no nothing. My death was so painless, so soft and comfortable, just like…bed sheets. My eyes hurt. I could feel a luminous light directing my eyes. Was this hell? I didn’t even deserve hell; I was raped and murdered for god's sake.

I struggled to open my eyes; the light wasn’t getting any better. Sour Tears stung my eyes as I opened them slowly; the bright light was surrounding someone before me. Someone I didn’t know; a man was sitting at my bedside, surrounded by the bright sun that was coming from the window. But it didn’t matter, I was dead.

"I'm dead aren’t I?" I whispered.

He laughed without humor. "No you're not"

"Oh" I looked around me; I was on my bed, at my home. So I wasn’t dead after all. I closed my eyes again, I couldn’t take it all in. he didn’t kill me, the ugly monster didn’t kill me and that's all that matters.

"Then who are you?" I asked him, with my eyes closed.

"He didn’t touch you, he won't come near you again, or any other girl" he said sternly.

My eyes flew open, his anger surprised me. "You saved my life" my mouth muttered the words involuntarily.

"You're welcome" he smiled briefly, got up swiftly and left the room.