A fat hot tear escaped my left eye landing on my cheek " oh"
I guess I thought It wouldn't hurt this much anymore, I guess I forgot how deeply in love I was with him, how his good looks and intelligence already made me feel less. And now the fact That another woman ,who is probably smarter and more interesting captures his heart added to it all.
I never really thought less of myself, I'd always felt content and happy with the way I looked, my upbringing and education..Funny how one person can change that fact and affect one deeply.
More hot, burning tears. I blindly reached for my phone and sent him a text. I clearly was using him and I didn't care.
* I want to see you*
*you will tonight*
* you okay?*
* yes. No*
* we'll talk about it tonight ok? I got training*
Of course. I threw my phone away and layed down on the bed , A little nap would have to do since the rebound guy can't be of use right now.
I blew my nose , popped a nice little anti depressant and was lost to the world.
I awoke hours later, head pounding from all the crying and well the long sleep. I rushed to the bathroom to wash up and get ready for the race. Husband was MIA. Surprise.
Fourty minutes later I was in distressed , butt flattering jeans, a white v neck tee and stella mccartney Elyse platform shoes. I spent extra ten minutes perfecting my feline eyeliner and powdered my nose. I grabbed my purse and my car keys and left.
It was my very first time attending a car race and oh boy was it delightful! The adrenaline-pumped atmosphere, the amount of youth cheering and clamoring and the whole excitement of it. it was all too contagious ; My heart rate quickly escalating, the fear factor along with the awareness that a bunch of hot guys were going fast with sexy race cars was just addictive.
And then someone announced something and I could spot a bunch of men in racing overalls and helmets running towards their tiny cars and the race began. The crowd went wild.
He won. Of course he did. And something else happened that night too; I kind of developed a serious crush on him. Maybe it was his tall, muscular form in the racing overalls, his thick hair sticking to his head from sweat or the fact that he smiled at me and a single dimple popped in his right cheek. I'm sure it wasn't that superficial but god I couldn't stop thinking about him.
That was one brief not so personal encounter , a quick hi and a nod and then he left. I was a little dissapointed honestly but I understood, he had to celebrate or accept an award or something. I was in awe of him. Strange.
An hour later when the whole thing was over I went to my car, banishing any hopes of seeing him again. I dropped down on the seat and started the engine. Nothing. I tried again harder but it wouldn't come to life. Oh shit shit shit. I obviously had a dead battery.
I emmediately called The husband of the year. Surprisingly, he didn't pick him. I tried his number three more times. Nothing. Cold fury grabbed hold of my chest travelling to brain and blinding me with it. My hands shook violently, I was so pissed I saw red, why the fuck didn't he pick up??? Who was I supposed to call?? It was eleven fucking o'clock and he didn't bother to even call and ask about my whereabouts. The hot pressure of tears behind my eyes began to choke me, clogging my throat. No, no , no I wasn't going go cry for someone who didn't deserve my tears.
I fumbled with my phone and my eyes landed on his number. Was I this desperate? Before I even managed to answer to that thought, my shaking hands were dialling his number. I was alone and stranded in a dark parking lot, of course I was desperate.
" hala" on the second ring.
" sorry to bother but I think I've a dead battery" my voice was small, a little timid.
" wainich? Lock your doors. Coming now"
I sighed in relief. Sweat gathering between my breats, at my hairline and under arms. Shit.
Five minutes later he tapped on my windshield still in his sexy overalls.
My heart thudded in my chest. I gulped and rolled down the window.
" haa 3asa ma sharr?"
" my car won't start " my voice all shaky and strange to me.
"Basee6a I'll fix it enshallah"
I nodded and he went to work, connecting our cars with cables and stuff . I watched him silently, my sudden awareness of him intensifying..was his hair always this thick? Was he always this gorgeously tall and fit? Even his ass looked fine. Shit, this wasn't good.
" try to start it now" He finally announced.
And it did work because he's obviously good with his hands. I blushed.
" thank you you saved me!" I said.
" any time" that dimple popped again. Shit, shit, shit.
We said together and laughed awkwardly.
" you have to go" he said , frowning.
" yes, I ..I'm still not sure what you want from me"
" isn't it obvious? "
" is this really a good time?"
" no but you have to understand where I come from. I'm a good girl "
" I know you are!" He said fiercely. " shaikha, this isn't about me using you or anything I just..its a long story ok? Want to talk tonight? I'll tell you everything"
When I returned back home, asshole's car was already there and that only intensified my anger and dissapointment.
He was there all along, how come he never checked his phone?! Wasn't he always texting his whore?
Fuming, I took the lift and stormed into the apartment. He was in that blasted divan , lying down.
" laish ma trid?" I said, barely containing my incredible hulk fury.
" na3am? Shfech dasha chethy" he sat up slowly.
" Laish ma radat 3la my zillion phonecalls???" Ok I lost it.
" shtaben y3ni? I was busy"
" busy watching tv?!?? Sayarti kanat wagfa ma dagait 3lek ela l2na mako a7ad eyey eshof eshsalfat elkhara-" shit I totally lost it.
His face changed now, guilt masking his hard , cold features.
" I didn't know that.., shaikha I.., who fixed it?"
" some gentleman , a total stranger. Thank you very much maby minik shay" I choked on a sob and fled to the bedroom.
I was hurt. He didn't give a rat's ass about me , he had absolutely no feelings whatsoever for me, even that slight respect was gone. I lost all respect for him, he wasnt man enough, he didnt care. I'm over this so over this. I let the sobs take over lying on the bed with my shoes and purse and all.
A minute later I heard the door knob turning and then heavy human weight shifting the bed. What now?
His hand reached for my back , shocking me , was he really apologizing?
I flinched and moved away.
" I'm sorry shayookhi" what??! He never calls me anything like that! He must be feeling awfully guilty. I stilled and he moved closer , I could feel his warmth pressing against me. His fingers brushed my golden strands softly, moving it away from my neck. " I'm sorry babe" he whispered in my eyes and kissed my neck.
It felt good, so good .
Will shaikha end up with Mubarak or Abdulwahab? Vote.